My exploration of the deeper meaning behind Harry Styles's first released song off his second album, The Fine Line.
“Do you know who you are?”
[Chorus]
What do you mean?
I’m sorry by the way
I'm never coming back now
Can’t you see?
I could but wouldn’t stay
Wouldn’t put it like that
What do you mean?
I’m sorry by the way
I’m never coming back
It’d be so sweet if things just stayed the same
(La-da-da-da-dah)
[Post-Chorus]
All the lights couldn’t put out the dark
Runnin’ through my heart
Lights up and they know who you are
Know who you are, know who you are
Do they know who you are?
[Bridge 1]
Shine, step into the light
Shine, it’s so bright sometimes
Shine, I’m not ever going back
Shine, step into the light
Shine, it’s so bright sometimes
Shine, I’m not ever going back
Shine, step into the light
Shine, it’s so bright sometimes
Shine, I’m not ever (oh)
[Chorus]
What do you mean?
I’m sorry by the way
I'm never coming back now
It’d be so sweet if things just stayed the same
[Bridge 2]
(La-da-da-da-da)
(La-da-da-da-da)
(La-da-da-da-da)
(La-da-da-da-da)
[Outro]
All the lights couldn’t put out the dark
Runnin' through my heart
Lights up and they know who you are
Know who you are
Do you know who you are?
My Analysis
Ever since the beginning of One Direction, each of the boys have struggled with self-identity. This is attributed to the sudden grouping of artists who auditioned for the X-Factor with the intention of being solo artists. Along with the screaming fans came the violation of privacy and inability to keep anything personal. However, things got worse as people theorized and spread rumors like wildfire. One thing that remained constant was Larry Stylinson, or the public’s desire for Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson to form a romantic relationship. Fans everywhere believed they secretly dated for years, making it difficult for them to maintain a friendship with the public always watching. While theorists and overly obsessed girls spent hours pining over minor details that had no credibility, Harry’s and Louis’s personal lives began to spiral with the constant headache of putting the theory to the grave, while maintaining a stable mental health and sense of identity. Eventually, as One Direction took their “hiatus,” (18 months, my ass), the boys split to create their own music and gain individual praise.
Harry Styles became much more than a musician, but also a fashion icon. With flamboyant outfits, theories of his sexuality rose again, leaving the general public to wonder. After releasing an incredibly successful and dreamy first album, his tour exploded, selling out in countries around the globe. Concerts consisted of Kiwi being played twice for the sake of shouting and enjoyment, water bottles sprayed on fans, and the most iconic grabbing of the pride flag a Harry fan has ever seen. Yes, I went to his concert. Yes, it was a religious experience. Yes, I lost my voice. No, I don’t regret a single second of it. Anyway, back to the pride flag, it’s very common for artists to wave one during sets primarily in support of the LGBTQ+ community whether they identify with it or not. However, Harry’s actions, outfits, and overall personality screamed at people’s gaydars. Not only this, but also the fact that Harry would sing a song called “Medicine” raised hella speculation due to its raunchy language towards kissing boys and girls alike. Unfortunately, although he never truly spoke of it, it was incredibly wrong of the public to attempt outing him whether or not he was bisexual or gay. Respecting his privacy and sense of self-identity are extremely important values that people often disregarded. Still, people tried to label him, yet he remained silent on the matter. Then, in traditional boy manner, he went radio silent on social media, hopefully working on his next album.
ALAS! We receive Lights Up at midnight on October 11, 2019. Lyrics, song, and video all released at once, like it’s Christmas morning. Upon examination of the lyrics, I gathered the general theme of self-identity and understanding who you truly are. The first chorus begins with a series of questions and answers, leaving listeners to guess the responses from the counterpart of this conversation. The thing that strikes me is his apology. To whom is he saying sorry? Why? Well, for starters, it could be an, “I’m sorry for being [insert sexuality]” if he feels he’s letting someone(s) down. Another possible explanation could be “sorry for making you wait so long to tell you who I am,” because maybe he himself was unaware of his identity. And lastly, it could be that, “this is who I am and I’m sorry that I’ll never go back to who you thought I was or who I used to be.” The third possibility makes the most sense for the rest of the chorus in the explanation that he has reached his truest self and doesn’t plan on straying from it ever again. The familiarity and comfort with sameness is often simple to retrieve back to without thinking further into it. For the duration of his fame, Harry Styles has remained this lovable icon and heartthrob to girls all over the world. He became used to the comments about his looks and cheeky personality, as well as those cringeworthy fanfictions that took the world by storm. (I don’t think I really want to see After, but that’s another thing.) Of course, he went along with it because it became so normalized. The suffocating reminders that he was this girl-worshipped god prevented him from exploration of any sort. Until now. It’s 2019, folks.
“Lights up, and they know who you are, do you know who you are?” Fans shed light on his sexuality for years, but now he has control and it’s his turn to self-evaluate. He’s coming out of the light, revealing his true self and asking his listeners if they know who they are. I mean, do any of us have a solid understanding of ourselves? I sure as hell don’t. I’m a financially unstable 18 year old college girl eating noodles and dried vegetables out of a styrofoam cup posting Instagram stories about our suffering environment! Who do I think I am? A mess. That’s who I am. Harry’s more important, though, so back to him. “All the lights couldn’t put out the dark, runnin' through my heart.” How can something be so profound and poetic, yet crystal clear? Harry must have felt lost and overall empty and sheltered within himself, not knowing who to trust or explain his thoughts to. It’s taken years of contemplation and self-experimentation for him to be fully comfortable in his own skin. In the video, he looks dazed and confused by his surroundings. With creative lighting displays, he sets the scene in a moody darkness. Then comes the sexual orgy-like scene with men and women alike, covering and dancing around him. It’s a haze of sweat and pleasure (ew) as he enjoys every aspect.
Yes, it’s possible he’s not coming out at all, BUT we have to make a note of the date on which the song was released: Coming Out Day. Lights up and he knows who he is! He’s decided that it’s time for the lights to go up so that he can be himself, whatever that means! Harry Styles, be your beautiful self. You are a true star shining brightly in our sky, so keep creating, you masterpiece. To the readers, this is an invitation to express yourselves just as Harry is doing. Whatever darkness you might be in, turn the lights up and reveal who you are, when you know who you are. Remember, in the words of Harry Styles, “Treat People with Kindness.”
This is in no way attempting to out Harry Styles; it is just a theory brought to my attention by my analysis as well as a friend’s suggestion.
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